Dear, United States of America. WTF?

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Well, it’s happened. The presumptive winner of the 2016 presidential elections is none other than THE Donald Trump. What, no applause? It’s true I’m afraid. Despite my clever Facebook memes (I even changed my profile picture for you, Hillz!,) my trudging through the complicated voting from abroad process and my contributions to the “I’m With Her” campaign, The Donald somehow pulled it off. I’m in a state of shock, sadness, anger and disappointment and am glad to be here in Spain with my family, though I suppose none of us is safe due to the long reaching arm of my beloved, though currently about-to-be-disowned, country.

Some say this has happened because, as in the case of the Brexit, the people are in protest against the establishment and want a change. Some say it’s because The United State’s history of racism and bigotry has never really gone away, and some say it’s because the end of the world is nigh and this is the beginning of the terror depicted in The Bible’s Book of Revelations. Who really knows.

What I do know is this. It’s an old saying…be careful what you wish for, it just might come true. For those of you that voted for The Donald because you wanted a change. Congratulations, you’re going to get it and then some. And guess what, it ain’t gonna be good. For those of you that cast a protest vote because YOUR candidate of choice didn’t make the running, well done. This is partially your fault. If you just didn’t vote because you’d rather sit and sulk about how much things suck and you knew better. Thanks, I hope you are very soon in a position where Trump’s “policies” will send you running for the hills. But please don’t come to my house and forget about visiting Spain. You know what, just stay away from the EU in general. You’re not welcome here.

Hillz, what can I say? I was with you and I still am. Apparently the country has forgotten the shit storm the last President Bush and the Republican Party left the country in. We have a short memory. And apparently the electoral college has decided once again to say, “fuck the popular vote.” But don’t let those bastards in the House and Senate get you down. You’re better than this. Keep fighting for us, for yourself, for the world.

To Donald Trump and family. It’s on you now. Please do better for us. Please don’t undo the good work President Obama has done for immigrants, women’s rights, the economy, etc. To Donny Junior, I haven’t seen you since you were a kid at prep school, please remember who you were then. That was a damn good kid. He could be a force for good for your Dad.

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